Total Randomness!
by botgal
Summary: Just a bunch of random ONE-SHOTS I came up with when I was bored and or lying awake in bed at night. Some are Bumblebee x Sari, some are not. Please review, but NO FLAMES!
1. Short Cut

This is just something I randomly thought up when I saw that one cell phone commercial. You know, that one with that girl that got her hair cut so short she looked like a boy's cut? I do not own the commercial or TFA. Enjoy!

"Come on Sari!" Bumblebee pleaded as he stood next to her bed.

"No, you'll laugh." she said from behind her curtain.

"I promise I won't laugh." he said honestly.

"Promise?" she asked hopefully.

"I promise!" Bumblebee said putting one hand over his spark and the other up to show he wasn't crossing anything.

"Well, okay." She stepped from behind the curtain so she was standing in front of her big friend. He let out a slight laugh with an uncontrollable smile on his face. Her normally long hair was cut so short that he was absolutely sure it was a boy's cut.

"You're such a liar!" she yelled playfully as she slapped his leg.

"I'm sorry! It's just, wow! Sari it's so short!" he said in between laughter.

"I know! I was originally going for a bob, but, then the hairdresser just kept on chopping, and well, there was no turning back..." she said as she looked down, smiling through her embarassment.

"Sari, it's just so short! But ya' know what? It is really, really cute!" he said with a smile.

"Is it really, _really _cute, _really_?"

"Yeah, really. Do you like it?"

"Ya' know what? I do."

With that Bumblebee put her on his shoulder and they walked into the main room to show the others.

I know, it's short. But the others will be longer and funnier. Just keep reading and I promise you'll love it.


	2. Balalaika

Hello everyone! This is my next chapter of 'Total Randomness!'. No slash, perhaps a few hints of Sari and Bee, but anyways. I do not own Transformers Animated or the songs Balalaika by Hatsune Miku and Koi no Fuga by Meiko. Let's get it on!

Sari stuck her head out the ceiling window and looked around. "All clear!" she whispered down. Bumblebee stuck his head out and had his own look around. They seemed pleased that there was no one around and gave each other a sneaky smile. Bumblebee climbed out with his teenage friend on his shoulder holding a black duffel bag. Bumblebee closed the window withought so much as the slightest squeak and jumped noislessly from roof to roof of the other buildings.

Little did 'Bee know, Prowl and Jazz were watching them silently from the shadows. Bumblebee and Sari had disappeared off like this for a number of nights now and now that the Elite Guard and Jazz were here, Prowl wanted to know just what they were up to. So when they were barely out of sight the two ninja-bots followed them across the rooftops. Bumblebee and Sari turned around when they heard a slight noise and Jazz and Prowl hid behind a chimney.

When the two didn't see anything behind them they shrugged and contunued on until they reached the roof they were looking for and jumped down through the sky-light. Prowl looked at Jazz and nodded. They were about to go when they heard the worst possible thing of the moment.

"Cycle-motor Prowl and Jazz Sir, what are you being doing here?" Jetfire asked from atop the chimney.

"We were following those two to see what they were up to Jetfire and Jetstorm" Jazz said rather cooly.

"We be following you to see what you be doing. We just be wanting to know why you are being leaving the ship this late during the nighttime." Jetstorm said in the same tone as his brother.

"Listen, you can come with us to see what they're up to, only if you promise to stay quiet." Prowl whispered.

"Okay cycle-motor Prowl, we is being quiet now." the twins whispered in perfect sync.

The two ninjas shook their heads at each other and they all jumped into the building Bumblebee and Sari had gone into. When they got in they were greeted by the surprise of dozens of humans sitting around circular tables. "Hello, can we help you with something?" two female voices in perfect sync with each other asked. They looked down and saw a pair of human female twins with matching outfits looking up at them. Their outfits matched up perfectly except one's was orange with black stripes and a white flower in her hair while the other's was black with orange stripes and an orange flower.

"Um, we're looking for our friends, Bumblebee and Sari, we saw them come in here-" Prowl started.

"Oh yes, we'll all be seeing them in a few minutes. Come with us, we'll take you to a table we reserve for folks like yourselves who have come to watch their friends perform. Follow us." With that they led the very confused autobots to a large table that looked like it was made for transformers. They sat down in large chairs as the two lifted up barrels of oil to them. At that point Prowl noticed a vaguely familiar shadow in the corner but chose to ignore it as they heard a voice announce, _Ladies and gentlemen, humans and robots. I am proud to present this weeks lineup of new singers in our very own 'Ongaku no ie'! First up, may I present with the most humble of introduction: the Meiko twins singing their song Koi No Fuga!_

The present humans cheered as the empty stage lit up. Backstage, the twins were more nervous than they thought they would be. "Oooh. We've never performed before! Are our headphones straight? Are out outfits wrinkled? Is our makeup smeared?"

Bumblebee and Sari went up to them and said "Calm down. Look, you'll be fine. Just go out there and do like you practiced, okay?" The twins looked at each other and looked back at them and nodded.

"You're right, thanks guys." With that, they stepped on the waiting platform and it rose them up through a square hole in the stage. They were holding hands and started their dancing and singing as soon as the music started.

(Now watch the music video 'Koi No Fuga with English sub' On your computer. The _slanted_ writing is what they're singing, the regular is the english translation.)

The autobots looked on in surprise. Every movement one twin made, the other copied in perfect sync. Almost like they were a girl and her mirror image. Though it was kind of hard to tell which was the mirror and who was the girl.

_Oikakete, oikakete._ Chasing after you, chasing after you.

_sugari tsukitai no_. I want to cling to you.

_Ano hito ga kiete yuku, ame no magarikado. _ The person disappears, at the rainy street corner.

_Shiawase mo omoide mo, mizu ni nagashita no. _Happiness and memories too, flow away in the water.

_Komado utsu ame no oto, hoho nurasu namida. _The sound of rain hitting the small window, tears soak my cheek.

_Hajime kara (hajime kara) _From the beginning (from the beginning)

_Musubarenai (musubarenai) _It didn't link (didn't link)

_Yakusoku no anata to watashi. _The promise between you and I.

_Tsuka no ma no tawamure to, minna akiramete. _In the playfulness of that brief time, I gave up on everything.

_Naki nagara hazushita no, shinju no yubiwa wo. _I took it off as I cried, that pearl ring.

They did the same few steps they did at the beginning then did another few perfect mirror-like steps in mirror sync. They did a sort of reverse dance back to back and then switched back to singing and dancing.

_Hajime kara (hajime kara). _From the beginning (from the beginning.

_Musubarenai (musubarenai). _It didn't link (didn't link).

_Yakusoku no anata to watashi. _The promise between you and I.

_Kaeranai omokage wo, mune ni dakishimete. _The face that won't go away, I hold to my chest.

_Kuchizuke wo shite mita no, ame no GARASU mado. _I tried to kiss the rainy glass window.

_DUN DUBI DUBA, DUN DU DUBI DUBA. Paya, paya paya. DUN DUBI DUBA, DUN DU DUBI DUBA. Paya, paya paya._

They kept on doing that until their voices died away as the platform lowered. The audience cheered them on as the music faded. _ Next up is two old favourites and our best dancers here by popular vote, Bublebee the Autobot and Miss Sari Sumdac!_ The audience cheered loudly as Prowl forced himself not to let his jaw drop. In a million years he would never have thought that Bumblebee, the mech who couldn't sit still for five seconds, would have the capacity to learn to dance. The platform rose again and Bumblebee and Sari were standing stark-still, then they began dancing. Sari was standing on Bumblebee's shoulder and they danced like Sari was a smaller mirror of him. They were both doing the exact same moves. It seemed like they had practiced it for hours on end.

(Put on Balalaika by Hatsune Miku. The **bold** is Bumblebee, the _slanted_ is Sari, the two _**combined**_ is them both together, and regular writing is the english translation.)

**Yurari yurari yureteitru, otomegokoro PI~NCHI! **My girl's feelings are in a pinch swaying back and forth!

**Kanari kanari yabai no yo, **_tasukete DAARIN! KURAKURARIN!_ This is pretty dangerous, help me darling! I feel dizzy!

**Nani mo ka mo ga atarashii sekai ni kichatta wa, takusan no DOKIDOKI. Norikoe! Fumikoe! IKUzo! **Everything has come into this new world, get over all of the excitement! Overcome it! Let's go!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

**Kono omoi wa tomerarenai! **I can't stop these feelings!

_Motto otomechikky PAWAA! _A girl shines with more chic power!

_**Kirarinrin chotto kiken na KA. N. JI! **_It's a slightly dangerous feel-in-g!

_**Balalaika, balalalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

_Mou DOKIDOKI tomerarenai! _The excitement can't be stopped!

**Motto DORAMACHIKKU koi HARERUYA, **_**futari dake no BARARAIKA! **_A more dramatic love, halleluja! It's our Balalaika!

**Sugoku, sugoku chikazuite, otomegokoro CHAN~SU! **I'm very close to you, this is the chance that my girl's feelings need!

_HAATO HAATO tobidesou, onegai DAARIN, HARAHARARIN! _Make my heart skip a beat, please darling, it's going pit-a-pat!

**Anata dake wo mitsumeteru ATASHI ni shiranpuri? **Are you pretending not to know me, who is gazing only at you?

**Kizuite hoshii no yo,**_ TOMEKI! _**YAKIMOKI! **_**SUKI yo! **_I want you to notice me, I'm excited! I'm impatient! I love you!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

_Sono himitsu wo oshiete yo! Motto otomechikku MOODO! _**Kirarinrin yappa egao ga .KI! **Tell me your secret! A girl shines with more chic power! Your smile is won-der-ful, after all!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

_Yoso mishitecha DAMEDAME yo! _**Motto ROMANCHIKKU koi SHARARANRAN, **_**kanadetai no bararaika**__**!**_Don't you look away! A more romantic love, sha-ran-ran, I want to play the balalaika!

_ONNA no KO wa itsu datte yume miru otome na no. PYUA PYUA no kokoro de, Koishite! Aishite! __**S! O! S-O-S! **_Girls are always dreaming about something. Fall in love with me, with a pure, pure heart! Love me! S! O! S-O-S!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

**Kono omoi wa tomerarenai! **I can't stop these feelings!

_Motto otomechikky PAWAA! _A girl shines with more chic power!

_**Kirarinrin chotto kiken na KA. N. JI! **_It's a slightly dangerous feel-in-g!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

**Motto DORAMACHIKKU koi HARERUYA, **_**futari dake no BARARAIKA! **_A more dramatic love, halleluja! It's our Balalaika!

_**Balalaika!**_

_**Balalaika!**_

The crowd broke into a large applause as the two bowed to the ground. The platform lowered back down and the three autobots ran to the back entrance to see them. "You two are real crown pleasers!" the Meiko twins approved.

"Thanks you two. It's all in the practice." Sari said before she downed a bottle of water,

"So this is where you two have been disappearing off to." Bumblebee almost choked on his oil when he heard that voice.

"Prowl! Jazz! Twins! What on earth are you guys doing here!" he yelled.

"We is following you because you are being sneaky out at nighttime." Jetstorm and Jetfire said in tandem.

"So, why exactly have you been sneaking out to do this? Couldnt you have just told the guys?" Jazz asked cooly leaning against a wall.

"Three words, 'Ratchet and Sentinel" Bumblebee said with his arms crossed over his chassis. "If either of them heard about this we'd never hear the end of it! They'd be ragging on us about it all the time! They'd just be on us about it at some of the worst possible moments! Get what I'm saying?"

"Actually, I do. I can sort of imagine that." Jazz said.

"So come on, promise you'll keep this a secret?" Sari asked with her big, crystal blue eyes.

"Well, alright. As long as you promise that you won't stay out too late when you come out here" Prowl said pointedly.

"Alright _dad._ We promise." Sari said.

After that the autobots left and Bumblebee and Sari went about their buisness. Just as they were about to leave they were confronted by the shadow that had been lurking in the corner the whole time. "Starscream! What do you want? If you're trying to kidnap us you'll have to take us down fighting!"

"Wait! That's not why I'm here. I have a little favor to ask." Starscream said putting his hands at his sides.

Sari and Bumblebee exchanged looks and looked back at each other. Sari crossed her arms over her chest and said, "Okay, what are you talking about?"

One week later...

Bumblebee jumped from roof to roof with Sari on his shoulder again, but instead, tonight they stopped at a dark alley. Sari turned and saw a dark shadow looming behind them...

"Sorry we're late Starscream, we had to make a mountain of excuses to get out here." Sari said in an exhasparated voice.

"That's alright, as long as you two made it." Starscream said as he stood up off of the pile of piped he had been standing on.

"Well, are you ready or what?" Bumblebee asked as Sari hooked a boom-box up to some small speakers.

"Of course I am. You two have been teaching me for a week haven't you?" Starscream mocked sharply. They shrugged at each other and got into position as Sari pressed the play button on the remote for the boom-box.

To be frank, they had been honestly surprised at how quickly he had leaned. Nonetheless, he danced with them, and he danced well at that. They were surprised to say the least that someone with such a high pitched voice could sing this song so well, but, ya' learn something new every day. The music started up and the three began the dance they had been training Starscream in for a week.

(Now, Starscream's singing is  underlined, and Bumblebee and Sari's is the same as last time.)

**Yurari yurari yureteitru, otomegokoro PI~NCHI! **My girl's feelings are in a pinch swaying back and forth!

Kanari kanari yabai no yo**, **_tasukete DAARIN! KURAKURARIN!_ This is pretty dangerous, help me darling! I feel dizzy!

Nani mo ka mo ga atarashii sekai ni kichatta wa**, takusan no DOKIDOKI. Norikoe!**_**Fumikoe! **__**IKUzo! **_Everything has come into this new world, get over all of the excitement! Overcome it! Let's go!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

**Kono omoi wa tomerarenai! **I can't stop these feelings!

_Motto otomechikky PAWAA! _A girl shines with more chic power!

_**Kirarinrin chotto kiken na KA. N. JI! **_It's a slightly dangerous feel-in-g!

_**Balalaika, balalalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

_Mou DOKIDOKI tomerarenai! _The excitement can't be stopped!

**Motto DORAMACHIKKU koi **HARERUYA**, **_**futari dake no BARARAIKA! **_A more dramatic love, halleluja! It's our Balalaika!

**Sugoku, sugoku chikazuite, otomegokoro CHAN~SU! **I'm very close to you, this is the chance that my girl's feelings need!

_HAATO HAATO tobidesou, onegai DAARIN, HARAHARARIN! _Make my heart skip a beat, please darling, it's going pit-a-pat!

**Anata dake wo mitsumeteru ATASHI ni shiranpuri? **Are you pretending not to know me, who is gazing only at you?

**Kizuite hoshii no yo,**_ TOMEKI! _**YAKIMOKI! **_**SUKI yo! **_I want you to notice me, I'm excited! I'm impatient! I love you!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

Sono himitsu wo oshiete yo! _Motto otomechikku MOODO! _**Kirarinrin yappa egao ga **.KI! Tell me your secret! A girl shines with more chic power! Your smile is won-der-ful, after all!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

_Yoso mishitecha DAMEDAME yo! _**Motto ROMANCHIKKU koi SHARARANRAN, **_**kanadetai no bararaika**__**!**_Don't you look away! A more romantic love, sha-ran-ran, I want to play the balalaika!

_ONNA no KO wa itsu datte yume miru otome na no. PYUA PYUA no kokoro de, Koishite! Aishite! __**S! O! **__**S-O-S! **_Girls are always dreaming about something. Fall in love with me, with a pure, pure heart! Love me! S! O! S-O-S!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

**Kono omoi wa tomerarenai! **I can't stop these feelings!

_Motto otomechikky PAWAA! _A girl shines with more chic power!

_**Kirarinrin chotto kiken na KA. N. JI! **_It's a slightly dangerous feel-in-g!

_**Balalaika, balalaika, baia-laila-kai-kai!**_

**Motto DORAMACHIKKU koi HARERUYA, **_**futari dake no BARARAIKA! **_A more dramatic love, halleluja! It's our Balalaika!

_**Balalaika!**_

_**Balalaika!**_

They ended the song, packed up, and left the alleyway as usual. The very day after that, Starscream and his clones attacked an oil rig trying to steal some of the fresh, black oil from its' source. The Autobots got there and fought them as they tried to collect some to take back to their base. Bumblebee shot at Starscream and missed by an inch. Slipstream in turn blasted Bumblebee in the chest before flying away from one of Sari's energy balls. Starscream landed next to the two and it looked like they were goners, but surprisingly, the seeker just kicked Bumblebee into the shallow water with out looking at him and flew into the air.

Before the lot retreated, Starscream looked down at Bumblebee and Sari and they understood. To anyone else it would just be a malice filled glare, but Bumblebee and Sari understood its' true meaning perfectly. Even though they couldn't be friends physically, because of their differences and their friends, they could still be friends in music.


	3. Friends and Best Friends

Here's the next chapter! Even if you didn't like the first chapter that much, I hope you'll like this one! Enjoy I own nothing!

**A friend:**

Prowl sat next to Sari and gently patted her back as he comforted her with reassurances that everything would be better. He told her that everything would be fine and that she would find the right one someday.

**Will comfort you when he rejects you.**

**A best friend:**

Bumblebee walked through the crowded park, with a very confused Sari on his shoulder until he found him. A boy with brown hair and golden tanned skin. He stomped heavily up to the human and stood in front of him. He cleared his throat and waited until the human turned around and his eyes widened. Bumblebee pulled himself up to his full height and yelled, "It's because you're **gay** isn't it!"

**Will walk right on up to him in a public place and yell, "It's because you're gay isn't it!**

**A friend:**

Bulkhead stood next to Sari as she got the call. Her boyfriend broke up with her over the phone. She ran crying into Bulkheads outstretched servos as tears streamed down her face.

**Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.**

**A best friend:**

Bumblebee punched the phone number into his comm. and waited until he picked up.

"Hello?" Sari's ex answered nonchalantly as he picked up.

"You have seven days..." Bumblebee whispered threatingly.

**Will call him up and whisper, "You have seven days until you die" to him over the phone.**

**A friend:**

Bumblebee tripped over a tool that Ratchet had left lying out and fell flat on his face. Ratchet immediately came to his aid and pulled him upright again.

**Will help you up when you fall.**

**A best friend:**

Bumblebee slipped on a bolt on the ground and fell flat on his back. Sari just kept on walking and called back to him, "Walk much, 'Bee?"

**Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ***?"**

**A friend:**

Optimus looked over all of the people in the park. He pointed the boy out to Sari and she ran towards him, turning back and and thanking him before running to her date.

**Will help you find your prince.**

**A best friend:**

Bumblebee silently apologized to the human in his hand. When he got back to the base he dropped the human boy on the couch and left them alone for an evening together. All that was left now was explaining why Bumblebee took him from his room in the middle of the night.

**Will kidnap him and bring him to you.**

**A friend:**

Bumblebee accidentally got his foot caught in a pot-hole and twisted his ankle as he fell to the ground. He tried his best to stifle the tears as Bulkhead worried around him asking him if he was okay before pulling him out and taking him to Ratchet.

**Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.**

**A best friend:**

Bumblebee reached back into the shelf to grab the can of paint, only to knock a heavy metal disk on his hand. He pulled it back quickly and held it as tears threatened at the corners of his optics. Meanwhile, Sari just stood there and laughed as she yelled, "Ha ha, loser!"

**Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"**

**A friend:**

Sari looked up at Bulkhead and offered him a barrel of oil she had brought from home. Bulkhead happily accepted it as Sari began posing for his latest painting.

**Will offer you a soda.**

**A best friend:**

"Hey Sari, can you get me a barrel of oil!" Bumblebee yelled from the main room. Sari complied and brought it over his head. "Well, what are you waiting for? Let me have it!" Sari did, and let the whole barrel's contents splash over his head.

**Will dump theirs on you.**

**A friend:**

Prowl walked into Sari's room and saw her on her bed, her pillow stained and wet from her crying into it. He knelt down with concern in his optics behind his visor and asked what was the matter.

**Will ask you why you're crying.**

**A best friend:**

Bumblebee walked in on Sari sitting and crying her eyes out with the others surrounding her. Bumblebee said not a word as he already knew why she was crying. With that thought in his head, he left for his room to get the shovel he had been saving for just such an occasion.

**Will already have a shovel ready to bury the ******* that made you cry.**

**A friend:**

Bumblebee sat alone in the Elite Guard holding chamber and looked up as Optimus walked slowly into the room. He talked with Sentinel, who still had spray-paint on his face. They talked for a few minutes, seemed to agree on something, then Optimus left leaving Bumblebee to wait until his bail arrived.

**Will pay your bail out of jail.**

**A best friend:**

Sari sat on Bumblebee's shoulder with an absolutely huge smile on her face despite the fact that they were in a holding cell guarded closely by Jazz. She looked at 'Bee and yelled, "_DUDE_, that was AWESOME! Let's do it again!"

**Will be sitting right there next to you saying, "DUDE! That was amazing!**

**A friend:**

Sari ran through the cold rain with a book over her head. When she was still about half-way home she heard a truck and went further back onto the sidewalk to avoid being splashed. She was surprised to see Bulkhead pull up and open his door. Sari thanked him truly gratefully as she climbed inside.

**Will give you their umbrella in the rain.**

**A best friend:**

Sari walked along the almost empty street with a large umbrella covering her from the intense downpour of rain. She saw a yellow car come up and she waved. Bumblebee transformed one of his doors into an arm and grabbed her umbrella before driving off with it.

"Bumblebee! Get back here with my umbrella!" Sari yelled and playfully ran after him.

"Come on! Run Forrest Run!" Bumblebee jeered on as he kept teasing her by staying just out of reach.

**Will take yours and run off yelling, 'Run Forrest Run!**

**A friend:**

"Thanks again for helping me move my stuff Bulkhead" Sari said as she packed up the rest of her stuff.

"Anytime Sari" he replied as he picked it all up and carried it out.

**Will help you move.**

**A best friend**

"Oh man, what are we gonna do what are we gonna do what are we gonna do!" Sari said as she had a spaz attack. Bumblebee waited antsily for her to calm down so he could pick up Sentinel and hide him in a closet until he woke up.

**Will help you move the bodies.**

**A friend:**

Bumblebee ran to Bulkhead and he hid his small friend behind him. Sentinel ran up to him and when he asked where Bumblebee had gone, Bulkhead pointed him away from him. Sentinel ran off while clutching the offending signs in his hand. Bumblebee popped out from behind his big friend and smiled.

**Will help you hide out from the fuzz.**

**A best friend:**

"Why did I let you drag me into this?" Bumblebee asked Sari as they backed away slowly from Sentinel. They jumped away from him and landed near the street. "Disappear in traffic?" he asked her hurriedly.

"Disappear in traffic." she said as he transformed and zoomed off into the horizon.

**Is probably the reason you're running from the cops in the first place.**

**A friend:**

Sari politely refused as Bulkhead offered her a chocolate bar from the base's vending machine. He kept on insisting until she pulled out some food she had brought from home.

**Never asks for anything to eat or drink.**

**A best friend:**

Proffessor Sumdac looked down at his daughter and asked her why there was almost no oil in the factory. Sari sighed, she had a lot of explaining to do once Bumblebee got there.

**Helps themselves and are the reason you have no food.**

**A friend:**

Sari waited until Prowl left her room until she broke down into shuddering tears on her bed. She just couldn't stand to let someone so strong and heartless see her like that.

**Has never seen you cry.**

**A best friend:**

Sari looked up at Bumblebee from the couch and smiled at him, and then they reminesced about how much she cried that one night. No one was there of course, and they liked it that way.

**Won't tell everyone else you cried, just laugh about you in pricate when you're not down anymore.**

**A friend:**

Prowl told everyone a story that Sari had told him, but Sari had to continually correct him for errors.

**Only knows a few things about you.**

**A best friend:**

When Bulkhead asked Sari about what kind of things she and Bumblebee had done in the past, she smiled as she thought up the funniest thing Bumblebee had done, but before she could say it, he passed them by in the hallway and started singing a tune.

"La la la, love letter, love letter, lala, looove letteeeer!" he sang slightly offbeat. When Bulkhead prompted again, she merely walked away.

**Could write a VERY embarrassing biography on your life story.**


	4. Bumblebee's weird conversations

Ratchet stomped into Bumblebee's room where he found Bumblebee hanging upside-down from his berth and Sari in a bean-bag on the floor eating from a box of pockys. Ratchet glared around the room and frowned. The place was a mess of data pads, papers, random metal scraps, and other unidentifiable objects scattered around the room.

"What's up doc-bot?" Bumblebee asked from his position on the berth.

"Kid, if I've asked you once, I've told you a million times... CLEAN UP THIS ROOM!" he shouted. Sari looked between the two and said nothing, a pocky sticking from her mouth and a magazine in her hand.

"Fine, fine, ya' don't need to shout. I'll clean my room." Bumblebee said swinging right-side-up and standing on the floor. He wobbled for a minute as the energon rushed from his head back to his body.

"Hmph, it's about time. Now how about you get started by organizing that shelf?" Ratchet said pointing to the slightly sagging stone shelf in the corner. Surprisingly, the yellow mech did it without a complaint. He did pause at one particular book, then slowly stood up and brought it over to his berth where he gently set it down.

"Whatcha' got there Bee?" Sari asked as she stood up and got to his berth.

"Just an old photo album. Boy this takes me back. See, this is my mom." he said as he pointed to a certain place in his album. Ratchet couldn't help but see for himself. He looked over Bumblebee's shoulder and in the album. The picture was of a beautiful green and silver femme. Her face was thin, kind, and motherly; and she was slim and fast looking. The next page Bumblebee turned to was a picture of him. It portrayed him tossing a ball in the air, small arms outstretched and ready to catch it.

"Wow, you and your mom sure were close Bee." Sari smiled as she looked at the next picture in the album. It showed what looked to be Bumblebee and his mother, the both of them hugging closely and smiling at the camera.

"Wha'? Oh, that's my dad." The other two jerked at this revelation. _He looks exactly like his dad._ They both thought at the same time. Sari voiced this thought and Bumblebee nodded. "Yeah, people always used to think my mom was his older sister instead of his bond-mate, and when I grew older people thought me and my dad were twins."

"Was your dad nice? He looks like it." Sari said as she gazed at the pictures.

"I guess." Ratchet stared at him for a moment until Bumblebee finished his statement. "I guess, as much as I remember, he died when I was really little, my mom raised me all by herself. I was pretty much the man of the house since she never bonded again." Ratchet looked at him with sympathy and sighed silently. "You know, when I look at mom and dad's picture I always wondered, what was it that drew them together. I think I remember mom saying something about them being friends since they were sparklings or something. I guess mom just couldn't leave him floating there, all by himself ya' know?"

Ratchet just shook his head and left. "Where ya going Ratchet?" Sari called after him.

"I'm just going. Kid, just clean your room by the time I get back." Bumblebee nodded and closed the album. Ratchet walked silently to the med-bay. That small conversation was going to give him a lot to think about.


	5. Thanksgiving special

"Alright Bumblebee, a little higher. Good, now a little to the left, the other left, right there!" Sari shouted to Bumblebee who was up in the ceiling. Bumblebee was hanging up a banner that announced 'Happy Thanksgiving!' to all those in the autobots base. He gave Sari a thumbs up and jumped off of the beam he was hanging from. "Great, now we need to set up the table. How long did you say the others would be gone?"

"From that allspark fragment excuse I put out there, maybe a few hours. You know how thorough they are with those searches. We'll have plenty of time to set up." _Bumblebee ya' there? _"I'm here Bulkhead, what's up?" _Where did you say you overheard Blitzwing and Lugnut discussing the allspark fragment might be? _"Not sure, I think they either said somewhere near Dinobot Island, or in the lake surrounding it. How long do you think you'll be searching?"_ Umm, boss-bot said we'd keep at it until at least afternoon. Why?_ "Just checking, see you later Bulkhead." Bumblebee disconnected the comm message and turned to Sari. "I was right, we have six hours as the most"

"Well let's get cracking then." she said. They spent the whole day setting up. They hung up turkey pictures, set up piles of energon cubes, checked the TV football guide and occasionally checked the monitors. There were no decepticons in sight and everything was perfect.

"This is perfect, hey Sari, what was it that you do before you eat at thanksgiving again?"

"It's called a prayer, or saying grace. It's when you sit down before you eat and give thanks for all that you have and all the good things that have happened to you. It's a major part of the holiday. Maybe you should do it."

"ME!" Bumblebee shouted. "Why me? You're the earth expert, you should do it! I don't even know what to say, or what to do!"

"Relax Bee, I'll tell you what kind of things you can say and how you can word it. But you have to make up what to say. To start off, I'll tell you how thanksgiving came to be."

Later that day, the others did indeed come home. Even Prowl paused when he saw the decorations Sari and Bumblebee had put up while they were away. Everything was red, orange, gold, and brown. "Happy Thanksgiving guys!" Sari and Bumblebee shouted when they came from another room.

"What IS all of this?" Prime asked as he gazed around at the decorated room.

"It's an earth holiday called Thanksgiving. It's a day when humans all sit around a table and share a meal with their family and friends. We wanted to make a surprise thanksgiving feast for you guys, so Bumblebee made up that story about the allspark fragment just to get you guys away."

"So that's why the kid was bein' so vague when he was tellin' us about the fragment." Ratchet grumbled.

"We just wanted to give you guys a nice surprise. Come on, let's eat!" Bumblebee said as he grabbed Sari and raced to the other room. The room was placed in a nice decorative state which copied that of the main room. In the center was a long table, big enough for about ten autobots. They each sat down in a chair and got comfortable. Bulkhead reached for a cube of energon and Sari slapped his hand.

"Ow! What was that for Sari?" he asked as he rubbed his hand.

"You need to wait Bulkhead, we haven't said grace yet." Sari said from her place on the table.

"What's that?" he asked the others. Everyone but Bumblebee shook their heads because they didn't know either.

"It's when you give thanks for what you have and all the good things that have happened to you. Bumblebee's going to do it." Sari explained.

"Bumblebee? Well this oughta' be good" Ratchet whispered to Prime. Bumblebee straightened up in his chair, put his hands together and began.

"In the year 1621, the brave pilgrims who sailed across the North Atlantic celebrated the first thanksgiving. They invited the mighty indian chief, Massasoit to a thanksgiving feast. He came, and brought 90 brave indians with him to celebrate with these newcomers to their land. With a great abundance of food and drink, Sir William Bradford and Captain Miles Standish were honored guests.

"Captain Standish had brought the pilgrims over the harsh north Altantic with almost no deaths. He brought his faithful passengers to the new world much as Optimus brought us to earth. So, we thank you Lord for our safety and good health, our new friends, and the food that we may eat. Amen."

"Amen" Sari concluded. "Alright guys, we can eat now." Bulkhead yelled out 'yes' before grabbing a cube and downing it. Ratchet came around to Bumblebee's end of the table and put a hand on his shoulder.

"I'll say it, you kids did good" and he gave the two one of his rare warm smiles.

**Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Enjoy the holiday and make sure to give thanks! Hope you liked the chapter.**


	6. Christmas drabbles

This chapter is a few prompts that I made for Christmas, there's a little Hanukah something in there for those who celebrate that. There's 25 in all, one for each day until Christmas. But I don't know too much about Kwanza so I can't do one for that. Maybe next year, Happy Holidays!

Lights

"I still don't see how you managed to get yourself in such a mess kid" Ratchet complained.

"Less talking more untangling" Bumblebee said as he pulled at the wires. "Whoever invented Christmas lights should be drug into the street and shot."

Shopping

"Well Sari, have you thought about what to give to the Autobots for Christmas?"

"Not yet dad. I mean, how do you know what to get a giant robot from outer space for Christmas? The only things I can think of are a new game for Bumblebee, a punching bag for Bulkhead, and a banzai tree for Prowl." Mr. Sumdac pondered this for a while before responding.

"Well, there's nothing wrong with a Santa hat."

"Nice try dad, but there's no tailor in the world who could make a Santa hat that big."

Good deed

Bumblebee looked around the hallway for a few minutes before walking out of Prowl's room, right before he walked into said mech himself. "Bumblebee, what were you just doing in my room?" Bumblebee just stood there as he tried to think up an excuse.

"Umm, bye!" he then threw a smoke bomb on the ground and disappeared while Prowl was coughing.

_Where did he even get a smoke bomb?_ Prowl thought about going after him, but decided against it and decided instead to see what he had done to his room. He gasped when he went inside. The tree was subtly lined with Christmas lights, there were bird-feeders near the roof of his room, and there was even a little garland hanging on the walls. _I think I'll forgive him for sneaking into my room. **This **time._

Desperate

"You know, I think the decoration companies are getting a little too desperate year after year." Sari said as she hung garland around the main room.

"Why's that Sari?" Bumblebee asked as he handed her a wreath.

"Around the middle of November, when I was getting stuff for the Thanksgiving feast we had, I went to the store to get some decorations for Thanksgiving, and I'm guessing that half of that stuff was for Christmas."

"They had Christmas stuff in the middle of November! I think you're right Sari, they're getting too desperate."

Wrapping

"Help" Bulkhead said as he tried to get himself out of the pile of crumpled wrapping paper and tangled ribbon.

"Bulkhead" Bumblebee said as he cut through the wrapping pieces"You are probably the only mech I know who could get himself into a mess that big with just wrapping things."

"Help" he turned and saw the twins tied together with a length of ribbon. He sighed and face-palmed.

"Next time, just use gift bags."

Sleds

Bulkhead walked up to where Bumblebee and Sari were sledding from. When he got there he saw that they had two snowmen on the sled instead of being on it themselves. "What are those?"

"Well, Ratchet and Prime told us to be more careful when we go sledding, so we made these crash test dummies to see whether or not the hill is safe to go down." Sari explained. Once they had set the snowmen in place, Bumblebee pushed the sled down the hill. Bulkhead watched it until it crashed horribly, then he looked and saw the remains of the snowmen.

"Ooh, I think I'm gonna' blow a gasket!"

"Well **we** wouldn't have steered it into the ravine, I think we need more accurate dummies." Bumblebee said.

William Tell

"What are you up to now?" Ratchet asked as he came out.

"I'm practicing my aim. I put a snowball on top of Jetfire's head, and I'm going to throw this snowball and knock that one off of his head, just like William Tell." He took aim and fired. Jazz had come out and saw the outcome of the throw right as it happened.

"Jetfire! Are you alright!" he yelled as he saw the fire twin hit the ground.

"Aw man, he flinched!" Bumlebee said.

The Peanuts

Bumblebee and Sari were in the middle of a Christmas marathon when Bumblebee asked, "Hey Sari, how come all of these old specials always end with someone singing a song?"

Naughty

"Line up the slingshot and wait until I say fire Bumblebee" Sari said as she loaded a gigantic snowball into the slingshot's pouch. She waited until Prowl was right in the line of fire to give the order, and the snowball flew perfectly straight and hit him in the face. "This'll probably put us on the naughty list, but it's worth it."

Mistletoe

"Hey Bumblebee, how come your face-plates are all red, and why is Sari blushing?" Bulkhead asked.

Hanukah

Bulkhead stared at the menorah in the shop windowsill and asked "Hey, what kind of Christmas decoration is that?"

"It's called a menorah, and that's not for Christmas Bulkhead, it's for Hanukah."

"What's Hanukah?"

"It's not something I really celebrate, so I don't know too much about it, but all I really know is that it has something to do with a menorah. It's a Jewish holiday so I don't know."

"What's Jewish?"

Ambush

"Hey Bumblebee, guess what? It's snow-!" Bulkhead was cut off as a fresh, crisp snowball hit him in the face.

"Tell me something I don't know Bulkhead" the yellow mech said before dashing out the door.

Prime sighed and shook his head. "This is going to be a long day."

Chestnuts

Sari and Bumblebee stared at the charred pieces of what used to be food as they pulled it out of the fire. It had seemed like such a good idea at the time... "It looks a lot better in the movies" Bumblebee said, summing up Sari's thoughts exactly.

Tree

Boy was Prowl surprised when he came into the main room and saw Bumblebee and Sari setting up a Christmas tree. They had agreed, no fingers crossed, that they would **not** cut down a tree. He was about to go and confront them, when he noticed the bottom. Instead of a tree stand, there was a pot at the bottom of the tree. A pot only meant one thing, roots. They hadn't killed the tree after all. He smiled and exited the room, maybe they weren't so bad after all.

Poinsettia

Jetfire and Jetstorm stared at the small, red plant on the table. It wasn't really curiosity so much as liking the way it looked. Bumblebee saw the two staring at it, and shrugged as he put down another one on a table across the room from them.

16. Non-believer

"Okay then, how do you explain how he delivers toys to children all over the planet earth in one single night? The earth's time zones aren't all the same. How does he do it hmm?"

"Ratchet, will you please stop being such a killjoy and just watch the movie?"

Overkill

Bumblebee walked into Sumdac Towers, and it looked like a box of decorations had thrown up all over the room. He looked at Sari, who sighed. "My dad really gets into the holidays."

Elf

Optimus Prime had seen some strange-looking humans before in his life, but never before had he ever thought he'd see tiny humans dressed in green with pointed ears. He asked Sari and Bumblebee about it, and they had said they worked for Santa. These human holidays were confusing.

Nice

_If there's ever one truly nice thing about Bumblebee and Sari_ Ratchet thought_ it's their concern and helpfulness to others._

Santa

Bulkhead was confused. Why in the name of the allspark did humans want a fat, old guy in a red suit to sneak into their houses. He ate their food and got soot on their floors, and they wanted him to break into their homes? Sometimes he just didn't get humans.

Blizzard

Bumblebee staggered into the base and collapsed on the couch. He was covered in frost and a lot of his armor was frozen. Sari, on the other hand, was nice and warm since he had put the heater on. He looked at her, then said "The next time you need a ride during a blizzard, pretend I have a private comm. number and call Bulkhead instead."

Caroling

Bumblebee sat in the park with Sari and closed his optics to enjoy the harmonious music the humans in the square were playing. Although they normally enjoyed loud and pulsing music, there was something to be said for slow, harmonious music of Christmas carolers.

Cookies

Sari stared at the burned splotches of dough on the tray that were covered with extinguisher foam. Thank goodness Prime was there, it was just too bad that the cookies were ruined. Next time, she was going to convince her dad to just get store-bought cookies.

Insomnia

Bumblebee checked his clock, only to find it had only been three minutes since he last checked the time. He sighed quietly as he closed his eyes. Who knew that four hours could be such a long time?

Happy Holiday!

As Bumblebee and Sari looked around the main room at the others as they opened their gifts. To them, the looks on their faces were worth more than the whole allspark in their eyes. Bumblebee looked at his techno-organic friend and said, "Sari, Merry Christmas"

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night. Happy Holidays!


End file.
